GAWD we are gross!

Maybe it's because I'm old now, wearing bifocals and everything. Or just the fact that I'm hitting a second childhood. 'Course, this one is more fun 'cuz my mom isn't there to yell! *snicker*

Anywhooo... As it was when we were kids, I've started making up words that only myself and The Man are privy to. And now you, lucky you! Mom, you might want to look away, I'm sure you will be properly horrified, so it's just best you wait until another day to read my blog.

Lately, in my old age, "Pee Keep" is a word I now use on a daily basis. Without grossing the world out, it's that little area that will hold a sneeze, cough, or laugh's worth of pee without getting all over your undies. Unfortunately, it's only one sneeze worth. Any more and you will have to change your clothing. Damn it.

The "Pee Keep" is also where my sister stores her farts. I think she secretly likes it there. Nice neat little bubble of air until it "POPS" and embarrasses her in front of her co-workers, and sets her off into hysterics.

The Man finds my use of the "Pee Keep" funny and will try to get me to fill it to overflowing, and seems to do just that, and frequently. I'm sure the neighbors are positive we are drunks and have privates that separate from our bodies, since I'm holding mine and running into the house so often.

Also in our home, we use "Tent", "Double Dutch", "Camel Kiss" *which I believe originated from my "Fart" lover sister* I'm a fragile little female, so The Man doesn't get a lot of my "Camel Kisses", although last night, I have to say I did overfill my "Pee Keep" when I gave The Man a "Camel Kiss". I got the hysterics when he jumped out of bed, horrified, mumbling about maggots and raw sewage from the hallway and trying to squeeze out the last of the room freshener. I couldn't hear much 'cuz the roar of my hysterics had taken over.

Never-the-less, I had to sleep with a towel, he slept with his hand curled around the can of room freshener, and the damned dog had to be let out of the room 'cuz his whining was driving everyone crazy. I don't understand the dog, excuse me, but I've been HONORED to smell some of THAT ass before and mine was WAAAAAY milder. At least I didn't scrub my butt on the carpet immediately after letting it fly.

And just for the record, The Man AND the damned dog try to gag me on a daily basis, so I was getting revenge. Unfortunately I had to overfill the "Pee Keep" to get it!